Listen to me read this to you here.
Taking a Walk on the Wild Side
Frequently callers will ask where they can meet someone for a face to face experience of whatever their particular kink is. While I may have ideas or suggestions, I primarily want to make sure you are safe in your adventures. You will often see or hear the phrase “safe, sane, and consensual” among the Mistresses of LDW. I want to touch on each of these things to help you have a clearer understanding of them.
Communication is Key
I often say everything comes down to communication. Even if you are the most submissive slut ever, you have to start with a conversation outlining the safe parameters of your submission. Any Dom or Mistress who ignores this step is not being true to the tenets of BD/sm. This immediately should be a red flag that they do not have your safety as a priority.
Safety First
Wherever you meet your new person, take some basic steps to make sure you are safe. If this is a secret meeting, and you can’t tell a friend, I suggest emailing yourself an itinerary of who you are meeting, their contact information, and where you are going. If possible, include a description of their vehicle. I recommend always driving yourself to the first few meetings, so as to not be dependent on someone else to keep you safe if you feel uncomfortable.
Secret Lover
If you are looking for a glory hole at an adult bookstore, there will be some level of safety inherent in that location. What you must take care of is your health. There are condoms that don’t taste horrid that you can use for oral and anal sex, and I 100% recommend you bring a handful every time you even think you may encounter someone else’s penis. According to healthline.com, for oral sex, you want to use non-lubricated condoms.
Stay Safe
If a stranger tries to talk you out of being safe, not using a condom, not driving separate cars, or if you are uncertain about anything else that may be construed as a red flag, get yourself out of the situation and try again with someone else. No amount of erotic kinky fun is worth trusting a complete stranger with your wellbeing.
Such a great read. Thank you for the essential information everyone needs to know.
Ms. Stephanie,
Without a doubt, communication is the key in any BDSM relationship. Like you wrote, when starting out is sets the limits of what a submissive will do, what they absolutely won’t do, and which limits they want to stretch. Of course, that communication has to be ongoing, because limits, likes and dislikes just might change.
Ms. Delia
Ms. Delia- I am glad you shared that the communication must be an ongoing conversation, even during, or especially during a scene. Sometimes an excited sub will take on more than they can realistically handle, and needs to back out quickly!
Thank you very much for the helpful advice, Empress Stephanie!
You are welcome, Jamie Michelle! Thank you for stopping by!
Great post and totally agree with you on this!!!! After much thought, I’m going to start calling on a regular basis as phone sex with mistresses is the way to go. It’s safe and can be done in the privacy of your home instead of going out to bars/clubs which I hate!!! That’s where the danger lurks as I’ve quit going out to places like that anymore.